Today I was home sick but not quite sick just sort of tired feeling I slept late and read a book and ate too much and i have forgotten what it feels like to be absolutely 100 percent healthy but i'm doing okay and that is enough. My book is incredibly graphic and it is about people addicted to heroin or speed or a whole assortment of things and sometimes they wake up in their own shit and vomit and sometimes they have to inject heroin through their dick which seems I mean you know horrible. But I guess the saddest part is they've lost the ability to have emotions, really. Or sustain thought. It kept raining today. I think sometimes rain is comforting and other times it just makes you feel isolated.
The girl saw everything because when the words are trapped outside of you there is nothing to do but everything else and so she looked around her and she wondered and she dreamed and to everyone else she was invisible so she could watch them with no fear but sometimes she wished they would look and sometimes she wished everything was different but didn't that just come with being alive?
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