bon chance!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm in Paris and I just got back from a dinner picnic in the park right in front of the eiffel tower and I was with my gay american godfather and all our american friends and we ate cheese and prossutio and bagguetes and every hour we watched the eiffel tower sparkle and light up and I don't even have to try to smile anymore I just keep realising that I've got this stupid goofy grin on my face and sue kept putting her arm around me and saying; 'isn't this amazing, arent we so lucky' and I just nodded and did the stupid smile without even caring she was touching me and usually I hate anyone touching me but I didn't even care and I'm singing in the shower again did I ever even sing in the shower tonight I sung 'stand by me' and 'sugar pie honey bunch' and Eds boyfriend heard and I don't even care that my voice sounds like reincarnated dead things and wewent to the Louvre and there was this entire massive room of Portraits of this woman from the 17th century and she was middle aged and unattractive and half of them were here flashing her boob or just chilling on a horse naked and Matt kept remarking on how they were all featured in her house and how uncomfortable he would feel if he were a guest eating dinner and looking at naked photos of this woman at her house and I don't even know why it was so funny but I love Matt and Paris and I don't know I'm just in love with everything right now and I went for a walk tonight with Ed and we talked about how much I should travel and how when you live somewhere else you realise how much you love your home and I do, I mean I really really do and I don't know everything just seems so absolutely possible and wonderful and just...full. Just full.